Farewell

Dear Jena,

I have so many things to say but I haven’t had the time to fix my thoughts yet. So kwentuhan na lang kita, even though I know that you know what has been going on since last week.

They asked me to give a simple eulogy on behalf of your Ina and Ama. Your brother, Jeric, was given a beautiful and touching funeral and we, your cousins, also want you to have one. Marielle bought half of those balloons. She was probably hoping that you would see how beautiful they were up there. Rafael Troy, my inaanak, was scolding Daniel Troy for not “properly” taking care of you (they were both 8 years old). Jayjay, Gian, Patrick and Boy stayed up late for several nights just to sit beside you. Gello, Mae-mae and Dana begged their parents to let them miss classes to be with you and many others. You know how our family copes during time of crisis.

After expressing gratitude to those who came to give their sympathies and prayers, I told them a little something about you. I told them about your preference for beautiful things. Although it came as no surprise since you were also a beauty yourself.

I told them about our discussion during one of your chemo sessions. The one where you said, “Ate, siguro may dahilan ang Diyos kung bakit ako may sakit ng ganito, ano?” You didn’t know how surprised I was when I heard that from you. I wasn’t used to discussing God’s plan with any of our cousins least alone with you. Well, at least not yet, until you made that statement.

I have always believed that God made us for a reason. I am glad that before you left, you became aware that God has this wonderful plan for each and every one of us. In a way, I envy you. You have already fulfilled your purpose and you have done it with flying colors. Samantalang ako, I am still looking for my purpose. Still wondering why God made me.

Sabi nga nila, mourning is for the living. We mourn for ourselves. We mourn because we will not be seeing you for quite a while. We mourn because we will miss you so much. On the other hand, I am very happy for you. I know how you love life but wherever you are right now, I am sure you’re happier because you’re already home.

We thank God because he has given us the chance to know and be with you during your stay here on earth. I know you are up there somewhere watching over us. Please hug Lolo Ciano and Jeric for us. Au revoir. We love you so much. See you in our dreams.

Love,

Ate