Mama

me and mama
Originally uploaded by canticles.

I called my mom to inform her that my cousin invited me over to stay at her place tonight. With this, she enumerated the things that I "should" bring with me when I go there including underwear, toothbrush, vitamins, pati nga jacket pinapapagdala ako kasi daw I am sick -- colds and cough lang po *eyes rolling*

I'm used to this now.

I told her: "Si mama parang first time kong mag-overnight sa ibang bahay"
She laughed and said: "Bakit ba? Eh sanay na akong ganun. Basta wag mo kakalimutan vitamins mo."
Siyempre I have to answer: "Opo"

Sometimes, I really get irritated whenever she does this. Super nakukulitan! But most of the time, I just let her. Because I know that time will come when I will miss this kind of conversation. So, let me cherish every moment now while I still can.

Lucban trip

Date: Saturday, May 14, 2005

It was one of those unplanned trip our family usually have so nobody’s surprised anymore when my parents announced at 11 in the evening where we’re going the next day.

Date: Sunday, May 15, 2005

Destination: Lucban Quezon to visit the now-famous Lucban Grotto :)

We left the house at around 4 in the morning. Papa decided to take the Nagcarlan - Liliw road going there to avoid the traffic jam. Since it was an early morning ride, everything seemed fresh. People were helpful whenever directions were asked. Even the plants opened up to welcome the sunshine.




1st stop: Lucban Quezon (Pahiyas 2005 Festival)

We arrived at the San Isidro Labrador Church at exactly 7:15am just in time to attend the later part of the mass.



Lucban is ever famous for its colorful kiping, which the town folks use to decorate the façade of their houses. If I’m not mistaken I think the local government annually gives award to the most beautifully decorated house. So we went around to observe the designs. Among them all I prefer these two:




On the road going to the Grotto, breakfast was served by mama with oatmeal, tart, puto kutsinta and pansit hab-hab on the menu :)

2nd stop: Lucban Grotto

The Grotto’s amazing. Picture? Here:




3rd stop: Pacific Mall
Where we had our lunch!

We headed straight home afterwards.

~~~

Inay and I had our very own photo session that afternoon.



~~~

I Can't Make You Love Me

sunrise at sampaloc lake
Originally uploaded by canticles.

by Bonnie Raitt

Turn down the lights
Turn down the bed
Turn down these voices
inside my head

Lay down with me
Tell me no lies
Just hold me close,
don't patronize

Don't patronize me

Cause I can't make you love me
if you don't
You can't make your heart feel
something it won't
Here in the dark
in these final hours
I will lay down my heart
And I'll feel the power
but you won't
No, you won't
Cause I can't make you love me
if you don't

I'll close my eyes
then I won't see
the love you don't feel
when you're holding me

Morning will come
and I'll do what's right
just give me till then
to give up this fight
and I will give up this fight

One step forward two steps backward

framing
Originally uploaded by canticles.

How can I not love you
by Joy Enriquez
from the movie "Anna and the King"

How can I not love you
What do I tell my heart
When do I not want you here in my arms
How does one walk away
From all of the memories
How do I not miss you when you are gone

Your Life Path Number Is 5

5 You are very versatile, adventurous, and progressive. With a 5 life path, you are one of those people who is always striving to find answers to the many questions that life poses. You want to be totally unrestrained, as this is the sign of freedom and independence. You abhor routine and boring work, and you are not very good at staying with everyday tasks that must be finished on time. You are, however, a good communicator, and you know how to motivate people around you, perhaps inclining you to be a teacher of some sort. A love of adventure may dominate your life. This may take the form of mental or physical manifestation, but in either case, you thrill to the chance for exploration and blazing new trails. You are apt to be multi-talented, but just as likely to suffer from some lack of direction, and there is often some confusion surrounding your ambition. On the average, the number 5 personality is rather happy-go-lucky; living for today, and not worrying too much about tomorrow. It is important for you to mix with people of a like mind, and try to avoid those that are too serious and demanding. It is also important for you to find a job that provides thought-provoking tasks rather than routine and redundant responsibilities. You do best dealing with people, but the important thing is that you have the freedom to express yourself at all times. You have an innate ability to think through complex matters and analyze them quickly, but then be off to something new. In the most negative application or use of the 5 energies, you could become very irresponsible in tasks and decisions concerning your home and business life. The total pursuit of sensation and adventure can result in your becoming self-indulgent and totally unaware of the feelings of those around you. In the worse case situations negative 5's are very undependable and self-serving.

What Is Your Life Path Number?

Mid-20s

You Are 25 Years Old

25 Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.

In love, you feel the most alive when everything is uncertain, one moment heaven... the next moment hell.

You'd like to your lover to think you are optimistic and happy.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless, cold-blooded, and sarcastic.

Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage pessimistically. You don't think happy marriages exist anymore.

In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

Rambling again

Last song syndrome (LSS):

I Think God Can Explain
Performed by Splender

There's a lot of things I don't understand
And there's a lot of things
I don't want to know
But you're the only face I recognize
It's so damn sweet of you
To look me in the eyes

It's all right, I'm O.K.
I think God can explain
I believe I'm the same
I get carried away

It's all right, I'm O.K.
I thing God can explain
I'm relieved, I'm relaxed
I'll get over it yet

I think God can explain

~~~

I have been in a very good mood for the past few days now – two weeks to be exact. And except for the very childish reason of getting lost in UP Diliman, there were no tantrums and weeping recorded yet.

:) yun nga lang, there’s a down side. My housemate has to suffer from my kakulitan and kadaldalan.

~~~

He is slowly explaining everything to me. And I, being a slowpoke, have to listen and focus very hard to cope up. Buti na lang patient si Lord.

~~~

My officemate’s asking me to see a movie tonight. Siyempre tinatamad ako. Pero wala rin naman ako gagawin and besides free yun. So SIGE NA NGA! :) Hero and Sandara! Here I come!

A mere observation

I’m so over mega tired today.

I went to the Senate (with my boss) to assist and act as secretariat during the Science Legislative Forum on Biotech and Human Genome.

I have no comment about the forum, nothing at all. The speakers and their lectures were good and credible; the audiences were participative; and most importantly the food and the coffee were great.

I just noticed something.

Kung sa building namin ay mamamatay ka sa init, sa Senate (GSIS Building) po ay mamamatay ka naman sa lamig. Super!

Comment ko lang:

Our government is encouraging each and every one to observe and put into practice the austerity measures. They have implemented the 4-day workweek to conserve energy. In addition to this very horrible schedule – yes, I am not in favor of this new schedule I still want the 5-day workweek because my work is piling up more than ever – we have to turn on the air con an hour after the start of the official working hours. AND that’s not all you have to turn it off an hour before the end of the official working hours.

Meaning, when you arrive at 7:30 am you have to turn on the air con at 8:30. So bago pa lang magstart ang araw mo you stink na because of excessive sweating. And you have to turn it off again at 5:30 pm since you HAVE to leave at 6:30 pm. Bawal ang overtime.

Our office is very strict in implementing these measures and yet some people are not. Eh sila nga dapat yung role model namin. Parang sige, here are the guidelines that you should follow. Follow them or suffer the consequences.

I just found it unfair. Yun lang *shrug*

Sometimes things really come unexpected

I usually hate Thursdays and Fridays as they signify the start of weekends. I would like to inform you that weekend for my family means going home. And this set up of going to and from Laguna every weekend really pisses me off. PLUS, I have this worry pa na wala naman akong gagawin sa'min.

Lately I noticed that there was/is something special every weekend. I don't know but it seems that He was/is preparing special activities for me... for me not to get bored and do something really really stupid siguro :)

For example:

April 22-24, 2005 (Fri-Sun)

Friday
My officemates and I went to Tagaytay Highlands for an office outing. The place is so beautiful. I promised my self that when I get super rich (not just rich, ha? super rich dapat), I'll buy a house and lot there :)

Saturday
As part of a search-in process, I was invited by my religion teacher in high school to sleep over in the convent to at least have a bird's eye view of the religious life. I attended their "usual" activities kaya lang feeling ko I'm not hone for that. Sabi nga, "many are called but few are chosen" and I don't think I am one of the chosen few.

Sunday
I went to Nazareth and stayed there until 1pm.

This weekend, for my whole stay there, my family and I prayed the rosary every night and went to church together on Sunday. Nothing extravagant but it was something worth remembering.

Yun lang :)

~~~

When I get back from Laguna yesterday, I found this note on my bed (from Tweena the twin of Anica):

What if?

God doesn't want us to let go all the time?
That the CHESS is true.
And sometimes, God asks us, "What would you do?"
And surrendering means "cheating"…

Very well then…

Pollination

pollination
Originally uploaded by canticles.

Everything in life is speaking inspite of its apparent silence.

-- Hazrat Inayat Khan

Oh my...

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid Disorder:	Low
Schizoid Disorder:	Low
Schizotypal Disorder:	Moderate
Antisocial Disorder:	Low
Borderline Disorder:	Moderate
Histrionic Disorder:	Moderate
Narcissistic Disorder:	Moderate
Avoidant Disorder:	Low
Dependent Disorder:	Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder:	High
-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! -- -- Personality Disorders --

~~~

Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCD)

What is Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder?

Quick Summary:
Obsessive-Compulsive personality disorder is similar to obsessive-compulsive anxiety disorder. People with this disorder are overly focused on orderliness and perfection. Their need to do everything "right" often interferes with their productivity. They tend to get caught up in the details and miss the bigger picture. They set unreasonably high standards for themselves and others, and tend to be very critical of others when they do not live up to these high standards. They avoid working in teams, believing others to be too careless or incompetent. They avoid making decisions because they fear making mistakes and are rarely generous with their time or money. They often have difficulty expressing emotion.

Symptoms of Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder:
Need for perfection and excessive discipline
Preoccupation with orderliness
Inflexibility
Lack of generosity
Hyper-focus on details and rules
Excessive devotion to work

Additional Information:
The potential for improvement with treatment is better for obsessive-compulsive personality disorder than for other personality disorders. A combination of medication and therapy tends to yield positive results.

Hello God

Posted by: canticles

(from a forwarded email)

Hello God,
I called tonight
To talk a little while
I need a friend who'll listen
To my anxiety and trial.
You see, I can't quite make it
Through a day just on my own...
I need your love to guide me,
So I'll never feel alone.
I want to ask you please to keep
My family safe and sound.
Come and fill their lives with confidence
For whatever fate they're bound.
Give me faith, dear God, to face
Each hour throughout the day,
And not to worry over things
I can't change in any way.
I thank you God for being home
And listening to my call,
For giving me such good advice
When I stumble and fall.
Your number, God, is the only one
That answers every time.
I never get a busy signal,
Never had to pay a dime.
So thank you, God, for listening
To my troubles and my sorrow.
Good night, God, I love You too,
And I'll call again tomorrow!

"Habemus Papam!"

I saw the face of the new pope yesterday.

This morning, as I was reading some online journals (blogs) na may entry about him, I was sort of bothered because in a way I agree with thiskid. The face of the new pope, Pope Benedict XVI, does not have the “openness” and “radiance” of Pope John Paul II’s, which is what I was expecting. I might be mistaken naman – well I do hope I’m wrong talaga.

I told M about this (yeah, we are exchanging text messages. He was the second one who told me that a new pope was elected last April 19) and he said, “Pope Benedict XVI was chosen by God to lead His people. Let’s just hope that he lasts for at least a decade man lang kasi nga matanda na.”

I have to agree.

~~~

Anyway, did you notice that Pope Benedict XVI resembles Sir Anthony Hopkins? Yup! Take a look…


Pope Benedict XVI


Sir Anthony Hopkins

So what do you think? :)

Snapshots

Presenting... (drum roll please!) The chapel of Canossa College San Pablo City :) One of the most peaceful and beautiful places I know.

OST for the day

Ito ang kanta ko ngayon:

O Hesus, Hilumin Mo

Koro:
O Hesus, hilumin Mo
Aking sugatang puso
Nang aking mahango
Kapwa kong kasimbigo

Hapis at pait Iyong patamisin
At hagkan ang sakit
Nang magningas ang rikit

Aking sugatang diwa't katawan
Ay gawing daan
Ng 'Yong kaligtasan


(Hinihiling nitong pulutin ni Hesus ang pira-piraso ng basag-basag na buhay, at muling buuin. Sapagkat Siyang sinugatan at binasag sa krus ang Siyang pinakamainam at pinakamabisang lunas at ligaya ng pusong sugatan at basag din. Sa gayong paraan, nakamtan ang lakas at tapang upang humayo at magdala ng pag-ibig at paghilom sa kapwa sugatan. - Bukas Palad )

I was asking for healing and yet Rosanne C. Romero, author of Amusing Grace, pointed out that we should “seek after the Healer. Not the healing.”


Ito yung gusto kong kantahin pagkatapos:

All Shall be Well

Too many sunsets have we seen, too may mornings far between
Too soon the clouds have passed us by, too soon the sun died in our eyes
Too many broken forevers, too long has been this stormy weather
No more rainbows after rain, and no more healing from the pain

Refrain:
Yet all shall be well, all shall be well
You'll see, all shall soon be well
All things, all men, all the world shall be well
Broken wings that cannot mend. Are we afraid to dream again?

The world is full of passing faces. Our hearts are bruised in many places
I know, you'll see, through all the pain and sadness
All things, all men, all the world shall be well

Ms. Tata's song

Nobody likes me.
Everybody hates me.
I’m gonna eat some worms.

CHORUS:
Long, slim slimy ones,
Short, fat, juicy ones,
Itsy, bitsy, fuzzy, wuzzy worms.

~~~

Naalala ko lang... Ms. Tata used to sing this song. Kala ko kinopose lang niya out of the blue, nung sinearch ko sa google, may song pala talagang ganito :) pero of all animals naman why worms????! blechk!

You are Casey from "Mad Love"
Take Which 90's movie character are you? today!
Created with Rum and Monkey's Personality Test Generator.

You're spontaneous, Idealistic and impulsive. You tend to jump into things without thinking of the consequences. But your life Motto is "Seize the Day"
Okay..So maybe you're...a little crazy. Aren't we all? At least you're fully LIVING. You have no regrets. You're a free soul.

Patience

Nagpadala ng text si Jena sakin:

God seldom does great things in a hurry; so let us wait patiently. Patience means waiting GOD’S TIME without doubting GOD’S LOVE...

Note to self: Toink! :)

A memorable weekend

April 3, 2005



I was awakened by the news that our beloved Pope John Paul II passed away to reunite with the Maker at 9:37pm of April 2, 2005 (Rome time).

As I watched the news the previous night, the Vatican spokesperson said that the Pope’s condition was worsening BUT he was “serene” - he was at peace. The spokesperson was asking the people to pray for the Holy See. What was different from the request was that he was not asking for the people to pray that the pope would be well; he was asking the public to pray for the Pontiff’s peaceful death. It somehow made the “thy will be done” statement a bit clearer along with the acceptance of His will and faith that goes along with it.

And when I heard the news, I was not shocked but it made me sad.

When he visited our country 10 years ago for the celebration of the World Youth Day, my family and I left for Manila at around 3:00 am and treaded the Taft Avenue just to see him.

He caught my heart when I heard the news that during the abovementioned celebration, he defied protocols just to be with the participants – just to be near us.

My favorite story of him goes like this:
During his first few days as Pope, he had no one to talk to. So he picked up the phone and dialed without knowing who would answer it. It was answered by one of the Vatican staff. The staff was so surprised and elated to learn that she was talking with the new Pope!

Nice noh? :)

I mean, he was not just anybody. He was SOMEBODY and yet somehow he seemed so reachable. It was once said that we preach best, and teach best, by our personal example. As a faithful servant of Christ, he became a great example to his people.

Au revoir Ioannes Paulus PP. II! I pray to see you again someday. :)

~~~

I accompanied Ate Baby to her speaking engagement in Canossa College, San Pablo. She was the keynote speaker for the high school commencement exercise.

I saw some of my former teachers there.
Mrs. Gesmundo – adviser in 1st year
Sr. Annie – religion teacher in 1st year
Mr. De La Mar – adviser in 3rd year
Ms. Lajara – adviser in 4th year

I have shared my life to them. In return they have shared their lives to me and influenced me in one way or another. During my 2nd year in high school, my adviser, Mrs. Ortega wrote a note to me. She said:

“Dear Jing, Teachers may come and go, but they will always be part of your life. I hope I’ll be one of them.”

Guess what Ms., all of you have become a great part of my life :)

~~~

April 2, 2005

I am an anti-social person, an introvert, and a listener more than a conversationalist. So you must understand that what you’re about to read was considered as a very big effort and opportunity to practice my people skills.

10:15 am. Nakasabay ko si Ate Glo sa jeep.
Ate Glo's the yaya of my brother for six years. We talked from the moment she saw me until we reached her house.

10:30 am – 1:15 pm. Kinuwentuhan ako ng dentist ko for 3 hours.
What was supposed to be a 3-minute consultation lasted for almost 3 hours – Yup! I lasted that long :)

3:45 pm. I acted as one of the host during the graduation of my cousin.

5:55 pm. While doing the dishes, I entertained Ate Josie, my mama’s balikbayan cousin. My aunt left us, confident that I could handle the conversation pretty well. Oh boy, she had no idea.

Everything went well naman :)

~~~

April 1, 2005

Dreaming that you are PREGNANT, symbolizes an aspect of yourself or some aspect of your personal life that is growing and developing. You may not be ready to talk about it or act on it. This may also represent the birth of a new idea, direction, project or goal. Dreaming that you are pregnant with the baby dying inside of you suggests that a project you had put a lot of effort into is falling apart and slowly deteriorating. Nothing works out the way you want it to.

and

Seeing a WALL in your dream means limitations, obstacles and boundaries. There is a barrier obstructing your progress. You may have been accustomed to your old habits and way of thinking. If you see a wall crumble, then it suggests that you have easily risen above your problems and overcame your barriers.

***

All in all my weekend, if not perfect, went well naman :)